I flipped the grilled cheese sandwich over in the skillet and, while it browned, reached into the refrigerator for the jar of Clausen’s kosher dill sandwich slices I keep on the top shelf. Because what good is a grilled cheese sandwich without a pickle?
Much to my chagrin, I discovered it was a brand-new jar, meaning I’d have to hurry and break the plastic seal around the lid and loosen its machine-tightened grip before my sandwich turned black. But I have experience in such things, so I grabbed a paring knife and poked it under the seal, which came right off. I knew better than to try to unscrew the lid without first banging it on the floor to loosen it. When I failed to hear the distinctive “pop,” I began to worry.
The lid was stuck tight and the butter in the skillet was burning and any minute now the smoke alarm would go off. By the time I slid the skillet off the burner and the sandwich safely onto my plate, my hands were too greasy to unscrew the jar lid no matter how hard I tried. So back into the refrigerator the unopened pickles went.
Rats!
I tell all this to set up what today’s column is really about: An “Andy Griffith Show” trivia contest held that very afternoon at the Algood Branch Library, hosted by library manager Andrea Batson and emceed by the inimitable Tommy Elliot. The contestants were small in number but wildly enthusiastic. We broke into pairs and were asked to choose our team name. My partner and I jumped on “Fun Girls” before anyone else could nab it. For the rest of the afternoon, we were known as Skippy and Daphne.
Then the competition began. Tommy would ask a question, teammates would quietly confer with each other and then write down their answer. Andrea kept score on a marker board.
Thirty-nine questions were asked in all. (The number was supposed to be 40 but when my partner and I became the Fun Girls, it ruined one of the questions.) Some questions were easy, some were hard and some prompted so much laughter and conversation that we could hardly continue.
There were questions about Ellie Walker, Andy’s first girlfriend who was also the lady druggist and the first female member of the Mayberry town council. There were questions about Mr. McBeevee, Opie’s friend who walked in the treetops and made smoke come out of his ears. Everyone in the room knew how Opie killed the mother bird and why the “Man in a Hurry” was stuck in Mayberry on a Sunday afternoon. We knew that Deputy Barney Fife kept his bullet in his pocket rather than in his gun. We knew that “The Darlings” were played by a real bluegrass band named “The Dillards.” And, of course, we all knew everything about “The Pickle Story,” which is my very favorite of all 249 episodes.
There were questions about Ernest T. Bass and Gomer Pyle and Goober Pyle and Floyd the barber.
Best of all, there were prizes. Every contestant received at least one. Because I was on the winning team, I was invited to choose two. My first pick was a copy of “The Boys,” a memoir by Ron and Clint Howard. Then I picked the Barney’s Bullet key chain. As the party broke up and Andrea began putting things back in order, I noticed that no one had chosen the rubber jar opener that pictured Aunt Bee studying one of her “kerosene cucumbers.”
I picked it up and told Andrea what had happened earlier that day when I had to eat my grilled cheese sandwich without a pickle because I couldn’t get the jar lid off. I asked if I could swap it for the bullet keychain.
“No. Just take it!” she insisted. So I did. It works beautifully. And I will treasure it always.
(August 23, 2025)